I don't know what it is but it just seems like we tend to want to run away from conflict the same we want to run away from feeling our emotions. I think it is either embedded in our DNA or we have had experiences through our life that has either consciously or subconsciously said "it is not OK to feel those certain emotions". It think it is probably a combination of the two. As it relates to our humanness, there is not much to talk about other than "it is what it is". As for the later regarding our experiences, there is something we can do. We can begin to name it, feel it, tell it, and grieve it. It is through this process that we begin to see these emotions move from extreme highs and lows to a more regulated state. Our emotions will still go up and down feeling extreme at times but they do not have to override our limbic system like they do when we get activated / triggered by comments, events, or thoughts.
I believe the beauty of relationship is that we get to be healing agents for others in their story and vice versa. Couples counseling strives to do this. It is the hope to connect in new, deeper ways of intimacy providing a sense of security...a feeling of home.